I didn’t make this, but I wish I had. Unfortunately it’s only funny if you know Spanish. If you want, I’ll post a translation.

This is way overdue, but here it is. I’ll try to do better next time.

Some people have asked me about donating money to my work here. I appreciate everyone who does that, but at this point in the year, I’d like to put your attentions towards a different, but related, project here at Adonai.

One of the things that strikes me about this school is that social class is almost irrelevant. I only found out later (when I saw some parents for special events) that some kids are pretty wealthy. I still don’t know who the poor ones are. But I know they exist. What I love is that anyone who is able can come to this school and be friends with one another and have the same chance at an education as everyone else. That happens through a scholarship program.

Each year costs roughly $500 USD for a student to matriculate in the school. Each year the families who can’t afford it apply for a scholarship. Each year a few of the staff at the school go to the homes of these families to interview them and evaluate their needs. Then, based on how much is available to give out, scholarships are awarded. Some make the cut, some don’t.

This year I’ve been invited along on these interviews. I’ll be able to see first-hand the blessing someone will really receive with a scholarship. I might even write a bit about it. But for right now, I’m asking for your help.

If you’ve been thinking about sending money to me specifically this Christmas, I ask you to instead send it to the scholarship fund. I believe I will know which children get sponsored by whom, and I can make sure you at least get a picture of the child you help. I’ll take it myself. If I can do more, I will.

If you feel like donating, send whatever you can. Smaller amounts get put together to form one scholarship, kind of like Voltron (best cartoon ever)! Here’s how you can do it:

Send checks payable to:
Apostolic Christan Church Foundation
1135 Sholey Rd.
Richmond, VA
23231

Just please make sure you write something like “Colegio Adonai Scholarships” in the memo field. I think you might even get a tax receipt mailed back to you.

Thank you won’t begin to cover the expression of gratitude. May your homes be filled this Christmas with love and joy, and may God bless you for your contribution to the lives of these kids.

-j

ps> props to whoever remembers the title reference.

It’s not much, but it’s what I got.

Incidentally, it’s the first set of lights I’ve put up and actually lit. I’ve hung them before, but one year I didn’t have enough and never bought more, so they stayed up til Feb when I finally took them down, never lit. Another year I bought more, but they weren’t the same kind, and I never could find the right kind, so they never went up.

This is the kid that lives with me. His name is Cristian and he’s 17. He’s a good kid, needs a good father-figure in his life. I guess that was left for me. Pray for me.

-j

I don’t think I’ve ever experienced heat like this.

And they tell me it will only get hotter.

I’m certain it was over 100 today. Here’s the thing: no air conditioning. The houses are built with stone or brick too, so the heat just cooks up your house until it’s like an oven, and even once the sun is down it is still hot inside. I’m currently sitting outside with a fan trained in my direction because there’s no breeze.

You can’t really open your windows because while you get a breeze, its a hot breeze, so it’s almost better to just draw the shades, close it up, and turn on the fans. My problem is I have no curtains. The guy who lived here before me was about as minimalist an American as I have ever seen. I still struggle with thinking if he didn’t need something, I don’t *need* something, but I’m beginning to accept the fact that I’m more cushy than he is. The locals might call it “mimo” (momma’s boy), but I think I am ok with that if it means retaining some comfort in this ridiculous heat.

I just want June to come so it will cool down.

Oh, and apparently it’s not a great idea to drink the tap water when it’s this hot out. Better to boil it or buy mineral water. I’d tell you what happens when you don’t, but I’ll spare you. Let’s just say it had a hand in completely ruining what should have been a fun day at the pool. I also experienced this stuff called “tiger tea” (jaguarete) today. It’s the most vile drink I’ve ever had. After the first sip, I puked 4 times.

Come visit!

-j

I’m listening to Christmas music to try to convince my body that it’s almost Christmas. Usually by now I’m all up into the spirit of the season. I love the sensation of cold air trying to make its way through my warm jacket, the crackle of the fireplace, the smells of cold and peppermint and spices and cider, being with family. And this year none of those things are a part of my life during December. It happens to be coldish today (I am wearing a sweatshirt), I do have a bit of a cold, people burn trash every day, my yerba has a little bit of a smell, and I am with an extended church family, but it’s most certainly, definitely not the same. My body refuses to believe Christmas is 3 weeks away even though my brain knows it.

Listening to my music I took note that Brian Setzer was singing about the “Holy Night when Christ was born.” It strikes me that secular musicians that everyone knows (Elvis, Mariah Carey, even N’Sync – don’t ask) sing about the birth of Christ, but in the States the stores won’t put Christmas in their ads (I don’t care who you are, it’s not a daggone Holiday Tree). I realize that there are, in fact, Americans who don’t celebrate Christmas, and I respect that. I even know some Christians who don’t celebrate Christmas because they don’t want to idolize the day. But I wouldn’t insult a Jewish person by calling a menorah a “Holiday Candle Holder”. Everyone knows what it’s for, and I don’t think anyone’s offended by it if they don’t celebrate Hanukkah.

That’s one thing I like a lot about the country of Paraguay. *Everyone’s* Catholic. Even if you’re not Catholic, you’re still Catholic. The president is Catholic, and many of the decisions he makes are based on his faith (abortion is still outlawed here). Don’t get me wrong, he’s not a great president, but I will digress going down that road. Maybe later. Anyway, walking down the street you can see these really cool Nativity scenes people have in their yard. Most of the ones I’ve seen look like the ones made in Areguá, and I definitely want to snag one up before I come home (I will buy it, not steal it from someone’s yard). It’s weird seeing icecicle lights when it’s 100 degrees outside, but I’ll take what I can get. They even put up those plastic snowmen. Everyone’s celebrating Christmas. Even if some only do it for the party (it’s a lot like 4th of July), they still call it what it is.

Please, all of my loved ones back home, hang a decoration for me. Drink some cider for me. Make some fudge and eat it for me (I can’t…they don’t have marshmallows here). Give everyone in your family a hug, and if you see mine give them one too. Embrace the warmth in the cold, and toss a log on the fire for me too. I’ll see you soon.

¡Que ustedes pasen una Navidad maravillosa y espectacular!

-j

PS> Could someone from Varina please take a few pictures of that house on Strath Rd. and email it to me? I want to show my friends how ridiculous some people are.

Ben, another American friend of mine in Paraguay, finished his second year of college this year, and he invited me to his college’s awards ceremony. It was my first time in a Mennonite church, as his school is a Mennonite school. About half the attendees were Paraguayan, and the other half looked like they should be speaking English. But they weren’t. They were speaking German.

I found it amusing that the only way I could understand someone who speaks German is by hearing them speak in Spanish. Fortunately the evening was conducted in Spanish, and I could even tell by their accents who was native and who wasn’t, more or less. It was hot as all getout in there. Don’t Paraguayans believe in air conditioning?! Despite the heat, we were all very excited when Ben received an award for, I think, having the highest grade point average. His wife literally jumped out of her chair and almost cried a bit. It was cute.

Days later, I can’t seem to stay away from the Germans. This past Sunday at another very large Mennonite church (they’re all over, I tell you) I saw, for the first time ever, Handel’s Messiah. I should say I experienced the Messiah. I’ve always wanted to catch it live, but I never thought I’d have to go to a foreign country to do it. On top of that, it was in German. Once again, I only understood what was going on because they put up the words in Spanish.

I have to admit I didn’t expect it to be amazing. I won’t call Paraguay lazy, but I will say they don’t do stuff the same way we do it in the States lots of the time, which causes my American “intellect” to want to show them a better way. I’m glad I was mistaken, because I thought it was fabulous. The orchestra was tight and enthusiastic, and the choir was on point. They also added a bit of a “play” as the music went on. The set design was ingenious. The same piece of wood served as the star, the manger, Christ crucified, Christ risen, and Christ the King. It was so clever and well-planned. Very, very professional, and I would have loved to stay for the second showing. And best of all, it was free! I think I would like The Messiah to become a tradition of mine during future Christmas seasons.

-j

Despite being several thousand miles from any Native (North) Americans and/or Pilgrims, turkeys costing upwards of $70 each notwithstanding, we managed to celebrate Thanksgiving Day.

I spend many weekends with a family I’ve been referring to as my hosts or my Paraguay parents. Both of these titles feel a bit odd; they’re not really my hosts except when I visit, and they’re both too young to be my parents. Now that you are partially acquainted with them, I shall henceforth refer to them as the Caballeros, or Karen and Oscar. As is customary when introducing someone, I will tell you a bit about each of them. Karen is an American who went to Argentina on a scholarship to the ACC Bible college. She met and eventually married Oscar and has been living in Paraguay for 20 or so years. Oscar (owe-scar) is a Paraguayan from a town called San Pedro. He’s the general director of the school at which I work and one of the three pastors of the Lambaré church. Both are fabulous people. And now we continue.

Karen being American, she has had Thanksgiving at least a few times, and this year was no exception, though ever so slightly different. The most glaring deficit was the mashed potatoes, but I made up for that last night. Karen cooked a delicious couple of chickens, capelletti pasta, green beans, stuffing (amaaaaazing bread), corn, and gravy. We invited some Paraguayans and explained to them the reason for Thanksgiving and a bit about what happened. Much like the first Thanksgiving, we had some native food as well as our European fare. Only this native food was Paraguayan mandioca (I think it’s manioc in the states) and chipa (cheesy bread balls). So true to American tradition, the immigrants shared a delightful meal with the natives, and each brought their own gift to the table.

For dessert I made two sweet potato pies, though you wouldn’t know it by looking at them. Their sweet potatoes are either red or white and are much more firm than our orange ones. They don’t have pie crust, so I made one from scratch that didn’t turn out badly. The pies themselves turned out fine, I suppose. They tasted more or less like sweet potato, but a little more solidly built. Whipped cream would have been awesome; I’ll take note for next time. What I failed to take into account, however, was that Paraguayans don’t eat much sweets. Between 10 of us, including some hungry men, we barely ate half a pie. It took nearly 5 days to finish both off.

As of right now, I may be spending one more Thanksgiving with my beloved Paraguayans. I want to be here for the end of the school year, which happens this week. Maybe my family will plan to have a Thanksgiving dinner in December next year.

-j

I’m backblogged but I promise the Thanksgiving update will come shortly. Yes, we had one, and it was fun.

I did you all a disservice the other day, and I hope you forgive me. If I knew it was going to be such a spectacular evening, I would have taken video of the whole thing.

Friday night the 21st was the annual program put on by the four youngest grades (if I remember correctly). Some classes did some choreographed dances, one to a song called something like “I Love You, Blessed Paraguay” (Rohayku!) that was sort of emotional for me even. Another class did a choreography to What A Wonderful World – my least favorite song, probably ever. What made it amusing was they put up a screen to show a video of the song with the words in spanish, only the projector was *behind* the screen. An engineer *not* was the one who did that. The words came out backwards.

I can’t explain how precious the two youngest grades were. One (I think Kindergarten) did this amazing musical involving a princess and some knights, an annoying lady in waiting, and someone who becomes a prince. It was about 30 minutes long, and while it was totally done as a recording that the kids mouthed, it was a spectacular piece of low-tech theater. The kids looked so good in their little medieval costumes (the throne was a chair covered in tin foil), and the kid who became a prince was so stinking excited to become prince, I thought he was going to knock someone in the face with his scepter. The princess was beautiful, which honestly is a little disheartening. There are tons of cute girls in the class, so how did they pick a princess? Well, she just so happened to be the most beautiful one in the class (blonde hair, fair skin…totally fairy tale princess), and my friend told me she is the image of beauty to a Paraguayan. It kind of made me sad a bit. I feel like Paraguayans don’t think highly enough of themselves.

Then there was the preschoolers. It sounded like these kids recorded a script beforehand and then acted it out. It was ridiculous! I couldn’t believe how well they did. I told Jason it reminded me of a Charlie Brown show. I loved every minute of it. The kids were dressed as palm fronds, a donkey, horse, sheep, parrot, moon, and a nativity scene with a real baby. It was so adorable. And one of the fronds kept wiggling his leaves in Jesus’ face, and though it wasn’t scripted, it was precious.

I’ll make sure I take my camera to the next set of presentations.

-j